In this article, we will be discussing 11 powerful ways to love yourself as you detox after a narcissistic relationship. These protocols will work no matter what kind of relationship it was, whether the narcissist was a parent, sibling, boss, friend, child, lover, or spouse. Collectively, these protocols will help you to detox from the trauma of narcissistic abuse and support your overall healing and well-being.
What are the 11 ways to detox?
- Do a full body nutritional cleanse (detox the cortisol/adrenaline from the body
- Embrace a daily meditation practice
- Seek online therapy for narcissistic abuse
- Re-embrace / Re-dedicate yourself to your spiritual connection to God/Source
- Take up a new hobby – get to know yourself again
- Spend more time with friends and family that love you
- Embrace EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique to heal
- Do a full body chakra cleanse meditation
- Do a sexual cord-cutting meditation
- Start Journaling
- Write a letter to the narcissist
1. Do a Full Body Nutritional Cleanse
Nutritional cleansing is a powerful way to purify the body. Nutritional cleansing is an important part of any long-term health strategy, yet it is even more important when you have just come out of an abusive situation. Being in a situation where your body is in a constant state of fight, flight, freeze, or fawn due to being in a connection with an abusive and manipulative person is extremely destructive to the physical body. It creates excessive levels of adrenaline and cortisol[1} which creates toxicity as it overburdens your liver, lymph system, and burns out your adrenals.
Embracing a cleansing lifestyle that enables you to do deep tissue cellular cleansing will support your body in ridding itself of this excess waste.
2. Embrace a daily meditation practice
Meditation has long been known to have healing properties on the body. It can help to lower blood pressure, improve sleep, reduce stress, anxiety, and depression, and promotes overall well-being. The more you embrace meditation the better able you are to remain in the present moment and not time travel back to negative experiences of the past or become riddled with anxiety about the future.
Embracing a daily meditation practice is a profound act of self-love. Always remember that self-care is self-love. Love yourself enough to take the time to ground and center yourself every day.
3. Seek online therapy for narcissistic abuse
Gifting yourself the opportunity to speak to someone about your pain and trauma is truly a blessing. While no one can know exactly what you went through in your relationship, there are people who intimately understand the trauma that can result from a narcissistic relationship. You are not crazy. Gaslighting is a real thing.
When you have been under the influence for a long period of time with a manipulative energy who constantly questions your intelligence, your motives, and your abilities it can be very easy to question your own sanity. Speaking with someone or if you seek online therapy for narcissistic abuse, who knows the patterns that exist in a narcissistic relationship is very powerful. They can provide you with the objective perspective that you need to see things more clearly and help you to forgive yourself for staying in a connection longer than it was healthy.
When you stay in a toxic connection for a long time it can take a toll on your connection and belief in God. Some people come to blame God for their situation — feeling that God should have protected them from this toxic individual who has undercut their self-worth, self-esteem, and sense of self.
You may feel that God abandoned you in your time of greatest need. Re-establishing and rebuilding your connection to the Divine is a powerful tool in your healing arsenal to detox after narcissistic abuse. Attending a weekly mass, service, or prayer meeting can put you in touch with a circle of people whose faith can help to strengthen yours once again.
5. Take up a New Hobby to Get to Know Yourself Again
Endings offer an opportunity for new beginnings. You’ve changed since you first entered that toxic relationship. Engaging in a new and exciting hobby that you always wanted to explore — but never did, is a great way to release yourself from your old identity — as you design the next version of yourself.
It doesn’t really matter what it is. It could be joining a book club to read more, signing up for fly fishing lessons, taking a belly dancing class, or learning to speak Arabic. The only thing that matters is that you pursue things that bring you joy and are aligned with what you are passionate about. This will imbibe your spirit with fresh energy. More than likely you’ll feel like a little kid again, you’ll have more energy, and you’ll even find that your JOY meter starts to rise!
6. Spend More Time With Friends and Family That Love You
Spending time with people you love and you know love you is one of the most healing and nourishing things you can do. Abusive relationships can leave you cut off from family and friends if your partner tries to keep you isolated so that you would be easier to control and manipulate. The loneliness that can creep into your soul when you have been in a long-term abusive relationship can be profound. As a protective measure from feeling so weak and vulnerable you tend to self-isolate which tends to trigger worry, fear, anxiety, and depression.
Make it a point to reach out to one or two friends a week to start rebuilding your relationships and make sure to get face-to-face with at least one person every week who you love and care for.
7. Embrace Emotional Freedom Technique
EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique is a phenomenal way to detox from narcissistic abuse. It will enable you to neutralize the traumatic experiences that caused you so much pain. It is a safe and effective way to release trauma that has been held in the body for long periods of time. It will empower you to learn how to connect with your body and discover the sacred language of the body.
8. Do a Full Body Chakra Cleanse Meditation
The chakras are key energy centers in the body. These chakras centers connect with meridians in your body that regulate the flow of energy or chi that flows throughout the body. Ancient Chinese medicine has known about these powerful energy portals for thousands of years. The earliest text that discusses acupuncture is from 600-500 B.C.[2] and researchers and archaeologists unearthed gold and silver needles in various tombs. It is clear that the wisdom of balancing your energy centers and meridians is something that
9. Do a Sexual Cord cutting Meditation
When you have sex with an individual your two bodies create a energetic sexual soul tie to one another. When you end an intimate relationship it is critical that you do a sexual cord cutting to disconnect yourself from that person’s energy, otherwise you will remain connected to their energy body indefinitely. This energy cord will directly influence your current energy body and will essentially be ‘in bed’ with you with your next partner. Practicing good energetic hygiene is very important.
10. Start Journaling
Journaling is a deeply healing way to detox and recover from an unhealthy relationship. Pulling out all your emotions; the good, the bad, and the ugly can be very empowering. And, it will be helpful if after you journal you go back and try to extract whatever lessons you can learn from your experience. Never let a painful experience pass you by where you don’t extract every ounce of knowledge and experience you can from it. By taking the time to learn the lesson you save yourself from having to repeat the lesson in the future.
11. Write a letter to the narcissist
I know this may sound corny but it is in fact very healing. The power of writing this letter is that you can say everything you want without any filter or fear of consequence. You never have to send it if you don’t want to, you just need to pull out of your battered heart, weary soul every single thing you’d like to say to the person that abused you.
This is a profoundly healing experience. And, don’t be surprised if you bawl your way through writing the letter and have moments of extreme anger, rage, and resentment. You might find that it might actually take you a week to write it. You’ll find you start it, then stop. You’ll come back the next day and then sleep on it. Just write everything you feel you want to say until you have nothing left to say. Then it’s up to you what you want to do with it. You can mail the letter or just burn it.
Stages of Healing after Narcissistic Abuse
Healing from narcissistic trauma and detoxing the physical and emotional body from narcissistic abuse is a process. It is something that should be taken with pure intention, and with thoughtful intelligence. The trauma that can be sustained in a long-term connection can be profound. It is helpful to understand the steps and stages you must go through to fully heal to be able to rebuild yourself and your life.
Signs You are Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
- You accept the reality as it is with no resistance
- You allow yourself to grieve the loss of the connection
- You allow yourself to fully feel your emotions
- You feel lighter, more grounded, and more joyful
- You embrace self-love and self-care becomes your priority
- Emotional distress such fear, worry, anxiety and depression start to lessen
Frequently Asked Questions:
1. What is the fastest way to recover from narcissistic abuse?
There are no short-cuts or quick fixes, you need to do the work and have patience with yourself as you take this journey. Trauma is a very tender issue and your heart and nervous system need to be respected.
2. What happens to your brain after narcissistic abuse?
Depending upon the severity of your trauma and the length of time you endured it, narcissistic abuse can result in brain damage – shrinking the hippocampus and enlarging the amygdala.
3. How long does it take to recover from narcissistic abuse?
Everyone’s path is different. Healing is an on-going journey. There is no one-size fits all answer to everyone’s healing. You take your healing journey one day at a time, one wound at a time.
4. How do I rebuild myself after narcissistic abuse?
Healing yourself after narcissistic abuse is an intimate affair. You will walk your own path — unlike anyone else’s. Take that path with curiosity, a sense of humor, some humility, and a lot of grit. It’s not pretty stuff to look at, and it will require you to face some ugly things, but the reward will be worth it.
5. Do I have PTSD from narcissistic abuse?
PTSD and CPTSD[3} can definitely be the result of long-term narcissistic abuse. If you believe that you are suffering from PTSD or CPTSD you would benefit from speaking to a professional to help you to heal and recover from this life altering trauma.
6. Will I ever be the same after narcissistic abuse?
No one is the same after any relationship. Narcissistic abuse does change you, whether you allow that change to be a positive or a negative change is up to you. You can learn and grow from the experience or you can choose to learn nothing, become bitter, and let the experience contaminate your future. It’s your decision.
Sources:
[1}Understanding the Stress Response by Harvard EDU
https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/understanding-the-stress-response
[2}Uncovering the 12 Meridians of Acupuncture – By Dr. Derek Kirkham https://acupuncturistseattle.com/the-12-meridians-of-acupuncture/#:~:text=History,also%20thought%20to%20influence%20Qi.
[3] Narcissistic vulnerability and the development of PTSD: a prospective study by Eytan Bachar 1, Hilit Hadar, Arieh Y Shalev
